Even if friendship breakups are not as frequently discussed as romantic breakups, they do occur, and they can be just as painful – if not more so. Here are its reasons and methods to help you cope.
Friendships are essential to most people’s emotional well-being. Close friendships are linked to higher levels of happiness, self-esteem, and a sense of purpose. Having lifelong friendships gives you a lot of fulfillment and meaning, but this only occurs when you both are investing time in the relationship, cultivating trust and honesty, and working through disagreements when they arise.
However, as with many relationships, friendships can end. It may be due to several reasons but one thing is sure, it will have its side effects. These include altered self-worth, sadness, grief, feelings of loneliness and isolation, leading to anxiety, and possibly depression.
Here are some ways to help you cope with the aftermath of a friendship breakup.
Why do friendships end?
Friends are more than just pleasant company at social gatherings or support systems during difficult times. A friend can offer the same level of support and emotional fulfillment as family members. This is why the end of a friendship can be as painful as heartbreak, and it could end for a variety of reasons, including:
- Outgrowing each other
Over time, some friendships could be worn out, and this could occur due to several reasons. Mauve your interests changed, you’re busy with your job/school, or your views have diverged. Also, it could be because you have decided to enter a different stage in life wherein the other finds it difficult to take part, such as having children while your friend is still single.
- Conflict
Conflicts could be another reason for a friendship breakup, and this could happy due to small, minor details or bigger ones. Once you reach a point where friendships no longer serve your personal growth, are causing you trouble, or make you feel pressured, this will lead you to a dead end.
- Expectations might change
Setting expectations within a friendship can create some tension. It is not easy to combine low and high maintenance friends. That is because one could think they are giving or sacrificing everything for the friendship while the other will still think that more could be brought to the table. When expectations constantly clash, the friendship may come to an end.
- Feeling distrustful
Perhaps you’ve discovered that a friend has gossiped about something you’ve shared in confidence. Or they want you to keep secrets that put you in jeopardy with people you care about, or they’re even engaging in illegal activity. That makes you no longer feel safe confiding in or being their confidante.
Coping with friendship breakup.
Here are 4 suggestions for dealing with the breakup
- Talk about it
It is often best to discuss why you are disbanded so that both parties feel respected and can understand why things went wrong and move forward. You may want to stop after the discussion. However, even if it’s difficult to tell what happened and why the friendship went wrong, the last call may be a better option.
- Learn to prioritize yourself
It’s easy to get caught up in the grief of losing a friend. This can result in a significant period of mourning the happy times, which can be detrimental to one’s well-being. Allowing yourself to feel the loss of a friend is admirable and even recommended. This, however, should not become the norm. Going for walks, exercising, and learning about life after loss can help you cope with the absence of a friend.
- Strengthen your bond with your other friends
The absence of one friend can help you realize the significance of others in your life. This is a good time to express your gratitude to friends who are invested in your growth and happiness in your social community. Spend time with these friends and cultivate your friendship. Now is an excellent time to consider how to expand your friendship.
- Take up new activities
Try not to spend time alone. A way that you can do that is by filling your calendar with multiple activities and outings with loved ones or other friends. But it’s also worthwhile to make new memories, which take up more mental space than reverting to old habits. These new memories have the potential to widen the psychological gap between you and your ex-friend.