If you’re suffering from a toxic bond, it’s very important to recognize and stop the abuse. What does a toxic relationship look like, and how to set boundaries where required?

Toxic relationships do not only affect your daily performance but could have significant downfalls to your mental health.  Whether it was with your partner, parent, friend, or relative, these unhealthy bonds can leave you in a total state of confusion, manipulation, and uncertainty. This could be present in disregarding, criticizing, gaslighting, or even, abusing you.

A study performed on over 10,000 individuals has shown a direct relationship between toxic relationships and anxiety. The solution? Setting boundaries!

Read on to know more.

Signs of a toxic relationship

In order to better understand your needed limits, you must first identify your toxic relations hip. Truth is, when you are in a toxic relationship, it is hard to recognize that because you will be influenced by your attachment and intimacy. However, several signs could help you define that scope, and these include:

• Feeling lonely or isolated
• Feeling manipulated or used
• Experiencing low self-esteem
• Getting constantly judged or criticized
• Detecting trust issues in the relationship
• Getting emotionally or physically abused
• Betraying your own needs for the other person
• Feeling emotionally responsible for someone else’s needs
• Realizing a disproportion between giving and getting

If you relate to these examples, you might benefit from setting boundaries.

What do boundaries in a toxic relationship look like?

Setting boundaries is an essential part of any relationship. They help create imaginary lines which others cannot surpass. In the toxic relationship frame, it is important to place these boundaries in direct expectations of how you want to be treated. 

Boundaries can manifest themselves in:

• Physical boundaries: These include respecting your body, privacy, and personal space. This is represented in refusing a physical touch or sexual activities, requesting time alone, doing separate activities, and standing up for physical abuse.

• Emotional boundaries: These include identifying your feelings, and communicating your needs and limits. Notice when you are feeling shameful, guilty, and undervalued. Boundaries are essential when you notice triggers around specific issues or situations.

• Intellectual boundaries: These include ensuring that you have mutual respect regarding your thoughts and ideas. Such boundaries set limits to insulting, criticizing, making fun of your views.  

How to set these Boundaries?

In order to set better boundaries, you must first be clear about your expectations, communicate them with the other person, and evaluate your needed steps afterwards.

Learn how to say no

Assertiveness is one key factor in a healthy relationship. A toxic relationship, on the other hand, increases your anxiety levels at any confrontation. Learning to say no will help put your needs back in the spotlight, and reinforce a balance in the relationship. Practice saying no to yourself in the mirror, seek help from your friends, and practice affirmations to increase your resilience. 

Practice Detachment

Once you detach yourself from the person’s control and fear, you will be able to better assess the situation. Detachment could include leaving physically, changing the conversation tone, taking space, refusing to have arguments, or stepping back from the relationship. It also includes refusing the other person’s emotional attachment to you and deciding to not provide them with their needed attention.

Seek support

Support comes in various forms. First off, make sure to seek emotional and mental support to cope with the aftermaths of a toxic relationship. Ask for your friends’, family’s or even professional help. Make sure both your mental and physical health are safe.